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  He got off the bed and went to her. At first he was calm and tried to take the book back. She played a small game of keep away and held the book just outside of his reach. The further it went the more frustrated and angry he got.

  “Knock it the hell off!” He snapped. His voice didn’t sound like him at all. It froze her long enough, he was able to reach out and snatched the book from her grasp. She stared at him almost overcome with fear.

  “What’s gotten into you?”

  “This book hasn’t been the best book ever. But it is a family heirloom and there's no way in hell I'll let you destroy it.”

  “This book has turned you into a man I don’t know anymore.”

  “I’m the same man, I just think in a different way then I used to.”

  “You’ve become obsessed, I wish you saw what I saw.”

  “I see things clearly.” His voice was still a long way from being his own. “I’m writing more than ever before, I’m more inspired, and I’m in the midst of working on one of the best books of my career. I don’t know if this has anything to do with that but I won't take the chance of you robbing me if it is.”

  “Why would I want to rob you? I want you to succeed as much as you want to.”

  “No, you wanted me to take a trip, you wanted me to take time away from this so I could help YOU relax.”

  “It wasn’t just for me.”

  “No? Then why did you bring it up? Face it, since we lost our child years ago, you’ve blamed me. It took years to admit it, but you did. If that’s the case why in the hell do you stick around? Explain that.”

  “Because I love you. Regardless of everything I love you.” She stopped and looked at the book in his hand. “I loved you, whatever it is you’ve turned into, I’m not sure how I feel about that.”

  “I’m me, just wiser, now I know where I come from.”

  “Why is it now, after you’ve done so much to distance yourself from it, that it matters?”

  “About the past?”

  “Yes.”

  He stared at her. Some of the hardness around his eyes had disappeared. She took that as a good sign. “Until I got this book, I knew nothing about my family. Now, I’ve learned a lot about them, and I’m grateful.”

  “Grateful for what? Learning that your grandfather was a serial killer?”

  Tom sat in silence. Instead he stood rooted. “I’m happy that I’ve learned about my family in some form. You can’t understand what it’s like. You’ve had a family your entire life. I haven’t.”

  “But you can’t deny that this entire thing has changed you.”

  “I think it has, but in a lot of ways I think it’s for the better.”

  She laughed. “I don’t know about that.”

  “That doesn’t matter. The fact is I’m not getting rid of that book. You need to deal with it.”

  She moved again and went to grab the book from his hand but he side stepped and pushed her. She fell down. He had ahold of the book in one hand. In the back of his head he heard the voice that had become so familiar as of late speak up. You know what to do. He felt his body go into autopilot. He walked over to her. She stared at him, this time frozen in fear.

  “What are you doing?”

  He took the spine of the book and slammed into her head over and over. Once he saw blood, he didn't stop. Instead, he continued to do this until the book was covered in blood. It felt good to release. He stepped back and stared at the body of the wife he’d shared a bed with for the last 6 years. She now laid dead on their bedroom floor.

  Chapter 39

  It took a little time, but he got the blood cleaned up out of the bedroom. He dried off the cover of the book the best he could. To his surprise, none of it got on the inside. He carried her body to the basement and placed her in the corner under some blankets, As he stood there, he patted her sunken in head.

  “You should have never come between me and the work I do. It’s become an obsession, you of all people should have understood that. I didn’t want to do this, but you left me with no choice. Remember that I'm sorry, I love you.”

  He got up and walked back up the stairs turning off the lights and locking the door behind him. He walked into the office and sat the book on his desk. Then he turned his attention to the computer. He opened the project window and stared at the screen re-reading the last bit of his writing before he started. He pounded away at the keyboard not realizing how in tune with the project he was as he wrote.

  As he flew through words at almost breakneck speed, then he heard a voice from somewhere behind him. “Don’t you care about us?” The woman’s voice asked.

  “Why would I care about a bodiless voice?” He came back without even skipping a beat on the keyboard.

  “Because your family killed us all, he killed us all in cold blood. The least you could do is care.”

  “Even if I did, there’s nothing I can do about it now.”

  “Sure there is. You can take this story public vilifies your grandfather and everyone knows who did all of these horrible things.”

  “But what does that solve.”

  “Everything. It solves everything because then, then we can sleep in peace knowing more than just the family of a man who killed us knows the truth.”

  Tom hesitated for a split second. “We?”

  “That’s right, we.” This time the voice of a man was entering his ears.

  “What’s going on here?”

  “We’re out to make you see that sometimes demons' aren't left in a closet. You had to have cared once, you talked to my family. Then you went looking for my body. People don’t just do that.”

  “I felt they should now yes, but you were also the only one with a family.”

  “That’s not true.” The woman came back. “We all had a family. You never cared to look deep enough, to learn our names, we all had a history and a story and you didn’t care to look.”

  “If I didn’t care then, I don’t care now.”

  “How can one man be so heartless?”

  Tom stopped again. “Heartless, how in the hell do you call me heartless, I worked my entire life to give my family better means. I spent every hour trying to do more for her, and how does she repay me.”

  “By trying to rid you of the biggest demon in YOUR own life.” Jennifer’s voice was like a knife cutting through the air. It froze him in place. “For someone who seemed to care about me so much, someone who wanted to make all my wildest dreams come true, you have a funny way of showing it. Instead, you leave me locked in a corner in the basement of a home we shared. I don’t think you’re realizing the man you’ve become. If you are, then I feel sorry for anyone or anything you ever come in contact with again.”

  “I didn’t want to hurt you.”

  “You were driven by a man whose only real joy was killing. He murdered, and he wrote about it. It seems as if you’ve inherited the traits of you ancestors.”

  “Shut up! Shut up all of you!” Tom felt himself shaking as he sat in the chair. He’d stopped writing and stared into the empty void of his office. He took a second, but he caught his breath as he did a familiar voice spoke to him.

  “The hatred you feel, is understandable. The anger you feel, is understandable. Everything that’s happened so far isn’t your fault.”

  “How can you be so sure?”

  “Because, she was right you know.”

  Tom sat almost frozen. “What do you mean?”

  “You inherited the trait. You’re a writer, it would have come out. That you killed your own wife was a surprise, but murder runs in your blood.”

  Tom sat there trying to work through everything. He wasn’t even aware that as all of this went on around him, he kept writing. It was something in the back of his head as he tried to get his own emotions under control. he pulled his hands away from the keyboard and stared at the empty room. He wiped the beading sweat off his forehead. After taking a glance around the room, he realized the voices, and the spirits we
re gone. Tom cracked his fingers and pounded away at the keys again, not even noticing when the sun went down that evening.

  Chapter 40

  The sun was well back above the horizon when Tom typed the two words he’d been striving toward for what felt like a lifetime, The End. He slid the chair back and looked at the computer.

  “We did it.” He said to no one in particular as he hit a few buttons and the program started the process of converting everything into a sendable document. He couldn’t help but smile at his achievement.

  “Man, I feel so relieved.” He said to the empty room again. It took a bit, but it finished and he saw the file pop up on his desktop.

  He launched his email from the desktop and waited as it loaded in. He dragged the file into the attachment bar and let it upload. Once it was attached, he turned his attention to the body of the email.

  Jason,

  You’ll find attached the first draft of the book requested by Doubleday. I’ve tentatively given it a title like Civilization X, or Colony X, but those are just ideas. I hope that this email finds you well. If you want to call me about it, do it this afternoon as I'm going to go take a nap.

  Sincerely,

  Tom.

  Tom pressed the send button, saw the confirmation, then closed the computer down. He slid the chair back and rubbed his eyes. For the first time since he’d started the binge he felt his eye lids getting heavy. He made his way toward the bed, but the couch came first. Once he’d hit the cushions, there was no going back, he was out like a light.

  ****

  Tom rolled over and looked at his phone when he woke up. It was almost 3 in the afternoon. His phone had no notifications which was a surprise to him. He sat the phone back down and walked into the kitchen. He poured himself a glass of water and sat at the table and drank it. As everything around him came into focus, he realized he wasn’t alone.

  “What are you doing here?”

  At the other end of the table Jennifer sat smiling at him. On his left he saw another woman whose name he didn’t know, on the right, there was what looked to be a child, they couldn’t have been more than seven or eight. Tom sat trying to get his head straight. Before he could talk Jennifer spoke up.

  “It’s obvious that you’re confused so let me get to the point. What you see before you is the possible family that could have been. But, you wanted none of that. You picked the family that never was. Now you’re alone and that’s all you will ever be is alone.”

  Tom sat there the glass of water in his hand, still confused but had nothing to say. Instead he stared at Jennifer and the two other people at the table.

  “You don’t even care it’s all gone do you?”

  “I do… I didn’t want to hurt you.”

  “Then why did you?”

  “I don’t know what came over me.”

  “Someone spoke to you didn’t they.”

  “No…”

  “That’s a damn lie. I now see everything much clearer then I used to, I see it as it should be. I’ve also seen the lies inside your head. I know William told you to kill me and I know your obsession has led to this. The question is where does it stop?”

  “It doesn’t stop. What happened with you was an accident. Something that will never happen again. As far as where I go that’s up in the air.”

  His phone rang on the table. He glanced a look at it, then back around. The three people at the table had disappeared. He picked up the phone and hit the accept button.

  “Hello.”

  “Hey Tom, it’s Jason, did I wake you?”

  “No, I woke up a little while ago. What’s going on?”

  “I’ve read this draft. I gotta say I like what I’m seeing so far.”

  “Thanks, it’s not been the easiest thing to come up with, that’s for sure.”

  “You squeaked in just ahead of the deadline too.”

  Tom stopped. “I did?”

  “Yeah, did you lose track? Tomorrow was the deadline. You threw in a buzzer beater.”

  Tom took a deep breath. Hearing it had made him feel better, but Jason picked up on something. “Is everything okay Tom?”

  “Yeah, well sort of.”

  “What happened?”

  “Me and Jennifer got into an argument over that book again. It was stupid and shouldn’t have ever happened.”

  “Is she still there?”

  Tom weighed his choices and put the story together in his head as he spoke. “No. She decided she didn’t want to deal with my, how did she word it? If you can’t see I’m more important than a damn book, then maybe I shouldn't be here. I assumed that she wanted nothing to do with me anymore so I told her where the door was. I’m not sure where she went, or how long, or if she’s ever coming back.”

  “You sound far more okay with that then I would be.”

  “God no, I’m a long way from okay with it. But, what am I going to do? I can’t chase her down and make her want to love me. If she doesn’t want to love me well she doesn’t. That is her choice.”

  “I suppose that’s true.”

  “What?”

  “It’s just, you seem so calm, like it’s not bothering you at all.”

  “I’ll be honest, it bothers me but the fact I finished this novel, means nothing is bringing me down today.”

  Jason laughed. “Okay, that’s a positive outlook.”

  “What comes next?”

  “As far as the book?”

  “Yeah.”

  “I emailed Doubleday this morning. They’re excited you made the deadline and want me to go over it. Send you back things I think you need to fix, you fix them or we compromise. That part is nothing new. After that though, we send it to their editors who will do 2 or three rounds of that same process.”

  “What am I supposed to do in the meantime?”

  “Get started on the next one would be my guess. If you get a jump start, you might end up far enough ahead you could take that vacation.”

  Tom kind of chuckled to himself. “That would be nice wouldn’t it.”

  “It would do you good.”

  “I won’t disagree with you there.”

  “For now though, take a little time off. Decompress, I know how stressful this has all been.”

  “You don't understand. I’ll finish that book. In fact I think I'll go do that now.”

  “Sounds like a plan. I’ll get back to you in a few days.”

  Tom hung up the phone. He got out of the chair and walked out of the office. He picked up the book and went to the living room and read.

  Chapter 41

  Tom sat down in the chair with William’s book. He flipped it open almost to the last section. He took a deep breath, not sure what to expect and he read.

  ****

  So this is it. We’ve reached a point where going further in depth just wouldn’t serve a purpose. I mean, I’ve shared all the information you need. Either to get me convicted, or whatever. But to be honest, I won't make it that long.

  I wrote this book to escape. Not because my soul, or heart, or mind couldn’t deal with the outcome of what I did. I’ll be honest, I knew what the outcome would be before I started. I don’t know why I did it but I realize that I should take a minute here and say something.

  First off, I’m not sorry for what I did, why would I be. Instead, I’ve shared a lot of this information hoping you guys learn that I’m not sorry. But then you must ask yourself. If that were the case why write this book?

  It’s simple. I discovered I'm dying a short time ago that doctors diagnosed me with lung cancer. There's not a lot of time left. A few members of the family that received this book knew, however most did not. I’m not looking for sympathy or anything of that nature. I get it, this is just Karma kicking me in the dick. But I wanted to write out these memoirs as a way to preserve a little of myself. To share a little of who I was with those who share the blood line.

  You know in the time it’s taken me to write this book, I never thought of h
ow to end it. How to put the final touches on it and say this is the definitive end. I suppose that’s how it goes. If I’m not mistaken, I don’t know a lot of writers who knew how to end their stories. So I guess I’m in good company.

  I should tell you about Valerie. I never saw her again. Though, it’s not from a lack of trying. I traced any lead down I could to find her with no luck. I’m hoping that one day I’ll see her and my child again but something tells me that’s not in the cards and that just doesn’t make me feel better.

  My actual wife, who I’ve never mentioned in this book by name, left me. I’m not sure if she realized that something was going on or if she got sick of me being on the road. I’ve got a feeling it’s a mix of the two. We had some kids together but I feel like they didn’t care one way or the other what either of us did, and who can blame them.

  As I write these last words, I’ve found myself alone for the first time in a while. I must admit that being alone like this with time isn’t healthy and knowing the end is right around the corner doesn’t make for good alone time.

  I’m sending this book to the place it needs to go today. With addresses and instructions. It’s not your typical publishing agreement but it will do what I want done. I can’t stomach sitting here wasting away anymore. So as I end my story, thank you for reading, but it’s time I take my final bow….

  ****

  Tom stared at the end of the book. Confused and curious as to the ending. He laid the book down in his lap and stared across the room into the blank wall. “What in the world just happened.”

  I was ashamed of the decision I made to end things the way I did. But, looking back it worked for the best. Williams’ voice rang through his ears.